Finding You
"Be good to yourself. Everything else will find you later. The less you respond to negative people, the more peaceful your life will become. Don't change. Just find yourself."
Mark Marn, Psychologist
Self-discovery and loving yourself in every form is an ongoing process and venture. The human body is a visible introduction to our invisible. Once we hit our twenties, there comes a pinnacle moment where we steer away from the hedonist mindset and have to realize that our choices impact our future. Our own checklist must be made filled with ideals, goals and principles we instill within ourselves.
Finding your personal identity, will heavily affect the daily choices which you will make to better your future. Choices associated with our habits, our lifestyle, removing toxic energies, and sacrifices to better your future.
Mistakes are bound to be made along the way, but we must learn from the wrong we do. Our hardships will contribute to who we are as people.
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Start the journey
Once we hit this moment of realisation, the first tip is to not be scared by it but embrace it. You realise that you want something for yourself and to reach your full potential. That's not saying that you can't have fun and need to be serious, but waking up every morning, with a purpose to be the best person you can be, however that is. We venture to find the balance within our daily routines, making sure we are enjoying our life and having a fulfilled life.
Write down your goals. This will help create clarity of your thoughts.
This is a free-flowing exercise. These will change over time and can either be short-term or long-term goals. There is no limit. Self reflection is an honest process.
You should sit down and ask yourself two questions:
1. Who am I?
2. What do I want?
3. Who do I want to become?
These questions have endless possible answers and continually change as we evolve as people. Always keeping in mind the goals.
This self discovery journey is internal. If you focus on that, it will naturally shine through your external.
Find your beliefs and expectations which you must live by. Let them influence the day-to-day decisions you make.
Delete all the toxins out of your life, whether this be people, bad habits, induct a healthy diet, and creating a suitable and balanced daily routine. Every decision you make will impact you in the future, either negative or positive, but remember the negatives will only make us stronger. Nothing is handed on a silver platter and you will have set downs, but you must be able to tell yourself every night before you go to bed that you did everything you good that day to progress into reaching your goal.
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Break away
We are instilled with certain patterns of thinking from a young age. We must break away from the norms, be true to yourself and to what makes you happy. You are not your parents. You are not the media. You are not the pretty blonde you sat next to in school. Although being aspects of it, you never will be any of these things. You are you. Find yourself, by yourself. Be comfortable. Be confident in your own skin. You should also be able to find your true self and be comfortable to express that self.
From a young age, we become a character to fit certain groups in order to be accepted by them. We change to be liked, accepted and settle for less than what we deserve to stay in our area of comfort. If you express your true self, and the people around you are not accepting of that, then their loss and your gain. The right people will accept you and will drift towards you. People who appreciate who you are will be a massive positive energy and influence in your life. They will motivate you, push you, and accept you for who you are and will not want you to change. You want this. You need this. We are all individual. No one in the entire world is like you, be you. Drift away your comfort zone. The comfort zone of the ideals society instills within us, discard your social group norms and or drift away from your family norms. Challenge yourself, and you will discover something new, whether you like it or not, push yourself and push new ideas and experiences.
It's confronting listening to your true self.The biggest struggle we have is acceptance from others. Will people accept this version of me? If they don't they just simply aren't worth your time. It's surprising. The more you express you, the more of the right things will ascend and attract into your life. Don't be afraid. Out with the suppressed you and in with YOU. Forget the norms, forget trends, find you and be you.
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Acknowledgements
Psychologist, Specialist Services, Marc Marn
Psychologist, Specialist Services, Henry Yun
Freelance Journalist Hannah Rey